Link to A Bit O Blarney.com

The "Random Irish Joke Generator" will show a new Irish joke each time the page reloads or refreshes. Click here to see it in action.

You will need to insert the 2 following sets of code into 2 different places in your HTML code. Copy the following code and paste it into the HEAD tags of your HTML code.

<SCRIPT LANGUAGE = "JavaScript">

// Include this script inside the HEAD tags of your HTML document as here

function makeArray(len) {
 for (var i = 0; i < len; i++) this[i] = null;
this.length = len;
}

// This is where the array of random jokes is created. You dont need to alter these in any way

ideas = new makeArray(16);
ideas[0] = ' What do you call a Kerryman on a bicycle? A dope peddlar.';
ideas[1] = ' A Kerryman went to London and found himself in the Underground late one night. Seeing a notice "DOGS MUST BE CARRIED ON THE ESCALATOR", he moaned to himself, "And where am I going to find a dog at this hour of the night?"';
ideas[2] = ' How do you recognize a Kerry pirate? Hes got a patch over each eye.';
ideas[3] = ' A Kerryman rang Aer Lingus and asked how long it took to fly from Dublin to London. "Just a minute sir," said the girl on the desk. "Thank you," said the Kerryman and hung up.';
ideas[4] = ' A fellow walked into a bar in Dublin and asked the barman if he had heard the latest Kerryman joke."I\'m warning you," said the barman, "I\'m a Kerryman myself." "That\'s allright," said the fellow, "I\'ll tell it slowly."';
ideas[5] = ' A man hired a Kerryman as an assistant to take phone calls. One day the phone rang and when the Kerryman answered he hung up immediately. "Who was that?" asked his boss. "Some fool saying it was a long distance from New York. I told him everybody knew that."';
ideas[6] = ' How do you recognise a Kerryman on an oil rig? He\'s the one throwing crusts of bread to the helicopters...';
ideas[7] = ' What do you call an intelligent Mayoman? Lucky ';
ideas[8] = ' What is red and white and floats upside down on the River Liffey? A Dubliner caught telling Kerrymen jokes. ';
ideas[9] = ' Why do Tipperarymen always carry a little rubbish in their pockets? Identification ';
ideas[10] = ' What\'s the difference between a Clareman and a bucket of fertiliser? The bucket. '; 
ideas[11] = ' A Donegalman rushed into a barber\'s shop with a pig under his arm. "Where did you get that?" asked the barber. "I won him in a raffle," said the pig. ';
ideas[12] = ' How do you save a Limerickman from drowning? You don\'t know? Good. ';
ideas[13] = ' Always an opportunist, Clancy walked all the way to the heart of Australia because he\'d heard it was virgin territory...';
ideas[14] = ' Did you hear about the Irishman who went to the moon? Well, he didn\'t like it. Yeah, no atmousphere...';
ideas[15] = ' You can\'t kiss an Irish girl unexpectedly. You can only kiss her sooner than she thought you would...';

// The random number generator. You do not need to alter this in any way.

function rand(n) {
seed = (0x015a4e35 * seed) % 0x7fffffff;
return (seed >> n) % n;
}
        
var now = new Date()
var seed = now.getTime() % 0xffffffff

</SCRIPT>

Put the following code where you want the Irish joke generator to appear on the web page.

Banner #1

banner #1

To link to ABitOBlarney.com using Banner#1, simply insert the above code into your html code where you would like it to show up.Be sure to right click on the banner to save it to your hard drive, then upload it to your site.

Banner #2

banner #2

To link to ABitOBlarney.com using Banner#2, simply insert the above code into your html code where you would like it to show up.Be sure to right click on the banner to save it to your hard drive, then upload it to your site.

Banner #3

banner #3

To link to ABitOBlarney.com using Banner#3, simply insert the above code into your html code where you would like it to show up.Be sure to right click on the banner to save it to your hard drive, then upload it to your site.

Banner #4

banner #4

To link to ABitOBlarney.com using Banner#4, simply insert the above code into your html code where you would like it to show up. Be sure to right click on the banner to save it to your hard drive, then upload it to your site.

Banner #5

banner #5

To link to ABitOBlarney.com using Banner#5, simply insert the above code into your html code where you would like it to show up.Be sure to right click on the banner to save it to your hard drive, then upload it to your site.